a joyous labor

I remember going into labor with Arrabelle.  There were moments throughout the labor where I wanted to quit, but I knew that there was only one way to end the pain… to go through more.

There are no words to describe the first time I embraced her.  I didn’t know I would love her as much as I did.  I really didn’t expect to be so overwhelmed.  I looked into her eyes and saw mostly Ben, and a little of me.  I was awestruck.  God gives us the freedom to create life – to make something miraculous from practically nothing.

I often feel like we most reflect God when we are creating.  The first thing we see in God’s character in the Bible is His amazing ability and passion to create.

Yesterday was tough in all ways.  It was one of those days I wished I was never called to plant a church.  I desperately wished Ben was the CEO of a major company, instead of a lowly church planter.  There were moments when I grew overwhelmed with the task of planting a church.

Today I received fresh vision for what it is we have been asked to do.  I thought back to the day when I brought Arrabelle into the world.  I alone know the sacrifice it took to get her here.  No one else bore the pain, no one else carried the cross of nine months of nausea.  And no one else got to sigh the relief of holding her for the first time, knowing… every moment of discomfort and pain was more than worth it!

As Church Planters, God calls us to carry the pain and discomfort of scrutiny, insecurity, financial hardship, disappointment and fear.  And yet, I know that in the midst of the journey, we are reflecting our Father in the most miraculous way – we are creating something from nothing.  God placed a tiny seed in our hearts and from that, we get to create.  At the end of the laborious journey, we will be able to physically embrace the fulfillment of what is now just a dream.

We get to create.  I feel humbled and overwhelmed that God would call me to bring His dreams to fruition.  I am thankful that I get to be the one to see His desires brought to life through my tiny hands.  The labor will be worth it and in the end, we will get to embrace those who God has given us, and we alone will know the tears that were wept to bring them into our arms.


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